Stuff. Things. Junk.

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2011-03-03T09:07:00.001-08:00

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Dear Manuel,

2011-02-23T11:57:00.000-08:00

Thanks so much for talking on speaker phone in the metro this morning. I'm not fluent in Spanish, but it sounds like your buddy Enrique got a new job. Good for him. It's really unfortunate that your train came before mine did because I couldn't hear the end of your fascinating conversation. I so wanted to know about your Dad's prostate issues, and whether or not you banged that slut Rita last weekend. Fortunately, several people on the green line this morning were kind enough to turn their iPod's up loud enough for me to hear a muffled cacophony of gangsta rap for the duration of my commute. Being deprived of respectful silence on public transit would be a tragedy of epic proportion. So thanks to you Manuel, and those like you, who make my metro experience extra-special each and every day.

Sincerely,
GFW

Political mad libs and the latest in GOP anti-ladyslation

2011-02-23T07:41:00.000-08:00

Friday the Republican-led House approved an amendment banning federal funding for Planned Parenthood. It seems our budget woes have become a convenient excuse for our mostly-male lawmakers to push their anti-choice agenda. Nevermind that federal law already prohibits the use of federal funds for abortions in most circumstances, or that Planned Parenthood provides important services which, among other things, can have the effect of reducing the number of abortions by providing access to contraceptives and helping women to make more informed sexual choices. As Rep. Nita Lowey, D-N.Y. pointed out, the GOP amendment will "make it harder to access pap tests, breast exams, routine gynecological examinations, flu vaccinations, smoking cessation services, cholesterol screening, contraceptives, and all of the other services that Planned Parenthood provides." The brilliant lady-brains at Jezebel have created an Anti-Woman Legislation Mad Libs so you can make your very own "Congressional speech in favor of your own diminished importance in America!" Enjoy vago-philes.

Past and present

2011-02-22T13:26:00.000-08:00

Photographer Irina Werning invites her subjects to go back to the future by recreating photos from the past. I'm totally intrigued by this idea and would secretly like to celebrate my progress from the chubby, permed hair, pink plastic-frame glasses wearing days of my youth. Here are some samples of Irina's work from her website:

Socks appeal

2011-02-19T07:59:00.000-08:00

I'm no foot fetishist, but there's something sexy about the sartorial subtlety of a well-chosen pair of socks.

Photo from Flights of Fab Fashion Fancy

Photo from Lucky Magazine's Retro Modern spread

Photo by The Sartorialist

Photo by The Styling Dutchman

Art that explains

2011-02-18T06:35:00.000-08:00

I love art that is both visually stimulating and educational. Pop Chart Lab's Taxonomy of Rap Names poster is just that. My favorite name has to be "Shorty Shitstain." And for best category I nominate "Improper use of the letter K" and "Animal, Vegetable, Mineral." I love a thinly veiled Barbara Kingsolver reference.

(limited editions x low prices) + the internet = art for everyone

2011-02-17T09:47:00.000-08:00

Recently I was lamenting my bare walls, and complaining to my sister-in-law that, while I have outgrown the Ikea decor of my college years, I can't afford sort of art I envision on the walls of a sophisticated (yet quirky) 30-something's apartment. Then she told me about 20x200, a website that sells prints in various sizes of original artwork by emerging artists for as little as $50. The website is the brainchild of Jen Bekman, owner of a small gallery in New York City's Lower East Side devoted to supporting emerging artists and collectors. One night in early 2007, Jen decided to take the mission a step further. She came up with a formula: (limited editions x low prices) + the internet = art for everyone. And BAM! the website 20x200 was born, making quality art available to everyone. The work sold on 20x200 is aimed at engaging a broad audience, not just seasoned collectors and art-o-philes. The site does a great job introducing art newbies to the artists featured on the site, and explains why that particular artist's work was selected. Below I posted a few currently available items I'm coveting.

Hello, grown-up apartment.

Valerie Roybal

Bert Teunissen

Jennifer Sanchez

Mark Ulriksen

Paul Octavious

Speciesist mockery: hipster dinosaurs

2011-02-16T07:38:00.000-08:00

Courtesty of Buzzfeed. Created by Molly Lewis.

Philippe Halsman's jump portraits

2011-02-15T10:54:00.000-08:00

Philippe Halsman is a Latvian-born portrait photographer who came to the U.S. in 1940. His work was often featured on the cover of notable publications such as Life magazine. His iconic portraits of notables such as Winston Churchill, Marilyn Monroe, and Albert Einstein remain part of our collective visual memory of the 20th century.

Though I'd undoubtedly seen his work before, I wasn't aware of Halsman until I stumbled upon Dali Atomicus. Halsman's portrait of Salvatore Dali captures the artist, three cats and a bucket of water in mid-air. Apparently it took 28 times to get the picture just right; I'm just glad I wasn't the one in charge of dealing with those wet cats. Dali Atomicus is one of Halsman's "jump pictures," his portraits of well-known people photographed mid-jump. The Smithsonian sums it up:

This odd idiom was born in 1952, Halsman said, after an arduous session photographing the Ford automobile family to celebrate the company's 50th anniversary. As he relaxed with a drink offered by Mrs. Edsel Ford, the photographer was shocked to hear himself asking one of the grandest of Grosse Pointe's grande dames if she would jump for his camera. "With my high heels?" she asked. But she gave it a try, unshod—after which her daughter-in-law, Mrs. Henry Ford II, wanted to jump too. For the next six years, Halsman ended his portrait sessions by asking sitters to jump. It is a tribute to his powers of persuasion that Richard Nixon, the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, Judge Learned Hand (in his mid-80s at the time) and other figures not known for spontaneity could be talked into rising to the challenge of...well, rising to the challenge. He called the resulting pictures his hobby, and in Philippe Halsman's Jump Book, a collection published in 1959, he claimed in the mock-academic text that they were studies in "jumpology."

"Jumpology" is an odd idea perhaps, but as Halsman once explained, "When you ask a person to jump, his attention is mostly directed toward the act of jumping and the mask falls so that the real person appears." With his whimsical approach, Halsman was able to get beneath the facade of his well-known subjects and capture some essence of the person within. Halsman once wrote "One of our deepest urges is to find out what the other person is like." It was perhaps his understanding of this innate curiosity that inspired Halsman's art and enabled him to capture some aspect of his his oft-photographed subjects' "true selves" with a curious authenticity that both intrigues the viewer, and allows her to connect with the subject on a personal level.

Salvatore Dali (Dali Atomicus)

Richard Nixon

Groucho Marx

Judge Learned Hand

Hattie Jacques

Putin rocks a mock turtle neck and the mic in effort to connect with streetwise Russian youths

2011-02-14T07:10:00.000-08:00

A blog for girls who like boys who like cats

2011-02-13T10:47:00.000-08:00

http://cuteboyswithcats.tumblr.com/

A picture of a former boyfriend of mine may or may not be on this website...

Heavy Metal Parking Lot

2011-02-12T07:31:00.000-08:00

Heavy Metal Parking Lot is a 1986 documentary about heavy metal music fans directed by John Heyn and Jeff Krulik. The film includes a series of interviews with heavy metal fans tailgating in the parking outside the Capital Centre in Landover, MD before a Judas Priest concert. For a little taste of the hilarity, check out the clips below:

Film Noir quote of the day: hating on horticulture in The Big Sleep

2011-02-11T07:57:00.000-08:00

General Sternwood: Do you like orchids?

Philip Marlowe: Not particularly.

General Sternwood: Ugh. Nasty things. Their flesh is too much like the flesh of men, and their perfume has the rotten sweetness of corruption.

The hipster persona

2011-02-10T11:10:00.000-08:00

This work of anthropological genius is from cracked.com

Bernini's Bacchanal: A Faun Teased by Children

2011-02-09T11:26:00.000-08:00

Gian Lorenzo Bernini (1598–1680) completed Bacchanal: A Faun Teased by Children in 1616 when he was only 18 years old. Wikipedia tells me that Bernini was the most important sculptor of the Baroque period, notable for his "unique ability to capture, in marble, the essence of a narrative moment with a dramatic naturalistic realism." Indeed, what struck me about this sculpture on a recent visit to the Met is that, as you walk around it, each side of the work conveys a different story and emotional perspective. These photos give some sense of that, but I definitely recommend stopping by the Met next time you're in New York City to see it in person!

Images courtesy of the Metropolitan Museum of Art's website.

This week in facial hair: the typestache and turtleneck beard

2011-02-09T06:56:00.000-08:00

Sold Through: Old Tom Foolery: Printed in the USA by: Mike Ritter

This rad idea found at ihaveanidear.blogspot.com

Ever wondered how snails have sex? Do you want Isabella Rossellini to show you?

2011-02-08T07:37:00.000-08:00

Isabella Rossellini is the daughter of Swedish actress Ingrid Bergman and Italian director Roberto Rossellini. She's famous in her own right for her roles in Blue Velvet and Death Becomes Her, and for her longtime stint as the face of Lancôme.

No longer content to play to role of retired model/actress/philanthropist, Rossellini has taken up the cause of animal sex education. She is the creative force behind Green Porno, a Sundance Channel series that features Rossellini herself acting out the mating rituals of animals and insects. The videos are both scientifically accurate and totally hilarious.

Rossellini believes her work has relevance to the human mating dance as well. Of her latest project Seduce Me, Rossellini says, "After my comical series, Green Porno, on how animals mate, I wanted to showcase a new series about how animals seduce each other with different, varied and incredible strategies...they might give us some new ideas about how to conquer our mates!" Whether I should take dating cues from snails, which use darts to inflict pain on their partners before mating, is a dubious proposition. But the videos are definitely good for a laugh.

Oh yeah, here's a fun fact for you: bedbugs "have penises like knives." Somewhere in New York City, a BDSM enthusiast is experiencing a certain cognitive dissonance about a bed bug infestation.

Kim Jong-il looking at things

2011-02-07T11:10:00.000-08:00

Tumblr, do you ever stop being awesome? http://kimjongillookingatthings.tumblr.com/

STD PSA's circa 1968

2011-02-06T07:58:00.000-08:00

Life 1968 Vol. 64, No. 20

American manhood circa 1952

2011-02-04T07:28:00.000-08:00

What defined manhood in 1952? Regular bowel movements and the ability to engage in underwater combat without oxygen tanks.

Photo from I Love Old Magazines

Catalog Living

2011-02-03T06:54:00.000-08:00

Each week I look forward to catching up on the lives of Gary and Elaine, a fictional couple that inhabits the world of home decorating catalogs. If ever you've looked with skepticism at an artful arrangement of twigs on a hallway console, or wondered why someone would have a bowl of 50 limes in a kitchen that doesn't otherwise appear to function as a tequila bar, then you might enjoy Catalog Living.

Putin's awkward blend of martial arts and ballroom dance

2011-02-02T07:06:00.000-08:00

Fabrice Fabrice Beast of the East

2011-02-01T12:33:00.000-08:00

I couldn't stop laughing when Nick Kroll debuted his latest character Fabrice Fabrice, a "craft-services coordinator and pudding aficionado," on episode 89 of the Comedy Death Ray podcast. You will find a clip if Fabrice Fabrice riffing on spoken-word poetry here. You can download the full episode free on iTunes or at the CDR wesbite; Fabrice appears at about the 15min mark.

Uncomfortable moments with Putin

2011-01-31T11:07:00.000-08:00

Another example of why tumblr brings me so much joy: http://uncomfortablemomentswithputin.tumblr.com/

I am so mid-seventies marriage material

2011-01-31T07:15:00.000-08:00

Can I retain leftovers from meals and prepare them attractively? Check.
Am I efficient in housecleaning? Check plus.

This hilarity was stolen from the Hairpin.

Hope, change, and unicorns

2011-01-30T12:44:00.000-08:00

Shepard Fairey is so 2008. Obama's messaging strategy for 2012 could really use more nudity and unicorns. Democrats, I give you artist Dan Lacey.

A swinging encounter with Artie Shaw

2011-01-28T11:14:00.000-08:00

I stumbled upon Artie Shaw while listening to NPR's All Songs Considered 24/7 music channel and was immediately smitten. Check out this track for a sample of his music:

Fun facts about Artie Shaw courtesy of Wikipedia:

Shaw was an innovator in the Big Band Idiom using unusual instrumentation; "Interlude in B-flat", where he was backed with only a rhythm section and string quartet was one of the earliest examples of what would be later dubbed third stream.
He signed Billie Holiday as his band's vocalist in 1938, becoming the first white bandleader to hire a full-time black female singer to tour the segregated south.
His band became enormously successful, and his playing was eventually recognized as equal to that of Benny Goodman. In response to Goodman's nickname, the "King of Swing", Shaw's fans dubbed him the "King of the Clarinet."
Shaw made several musical shorts in 1939. He also portrayed himself in the Fred Astaire film Second Chorus (1940), which featured Shaw and his orchestra playing "Concerto for Clarinet." The film brought him two Oscar nominations, for Best Score and Best Song ("Love of My Life")
In 1954, Shaw stopped playing the clarinet, citing his own perfectionism, which, he later said, would have killed him. He explained to a reporter, "In the world we live in, compulsive perfectionists finish last. You have to be Lawrence Welk or, on another level, Irving Berlin, and write the same kind of music over and over again. I'm not able to do that."

United States of Shame

2011-01-27T09:02:00.000-08:00

This handy map from Pleated Jeans identifies America's pitfalls state by scandalous state. For more info on the stats behind the graphic, check their site.

Are you my mother? Lessons on love from a children's book

2011-01-26T12:59:00.000-08:00

Are You My Mother? is a children's book about a baby chick that hatches and goes in search of it's mother. In turn he asks a kitten, a hen, a dog, a cow, a car, a boat, and a plane if they are his mother. Each says no.

There's something about dating that makes me feel like this confused little bird. I go out on a date with a steamship - it's so nice and shiny! - only to realize it is so not my mother and I feel like a total tardbot for even giving it a second look. Then I go out with something not-so-shiny, having learned that shiny objects are definitely not my mother, only to find out that he isn't my mother either.

At the end of the book, the baby chick climbs into the teeth of a power shovel to see if maybe that is his mother. The shovel starts to move, lifting its huge metal arm as the duck, terrified, screams "I want my mother!." Then, in a swift reversal of fortune, the shovel drops the chick back into a nest, reuniting him with his mother who has just returned with food for her baby.

Just when the chick had all but given up, finding himself scared and alone in the clutches of heavy machinery, on the verge of being crushed (or at least in need of a tetanus shot), he is reunited with his mother by twist of fate. Perhaps we too would fare better relying on fate to find love rather than looking for it. Should singletons the world over delete their OKCupid and Match.com accounts in deference to the wisdom of Dr. Seuss? Maybe not.

But we shouldn't overlook what fate brings us, even if it doesn't come with a profile photo or "about me" description that we can compare to our mental checklist of desirable qualities in a mate. In the online dating world we rely on those things to assess future compatibility, and to determine whether someone is worth the emotional risk of getting involved, because it gives us a sense of control over the risky business of dating. After years of dating trials and errors I am much better equipped now to determine what sort of person is "right" for me. While I am less likely to fall for the wrong guy, I don't know that I am more likely to meet the right one. If the story of the little bird tells us anything, it's that some things in life are a matter of fate. As we wait for fate to intercede, we continue the process of trial and error, hopefully learning from our mistakes along the way.

The unfunkable

2011-01-23T10:06:00.000-08:00

I was in a funk all day yesterday. When I'm stressed or out of sorts, I tend to do a lot of baking or cleaning. I'm not sure what compels me to enter Martha Stewart's consciousness in this manner, but it has an oddly cathartic effect. Or it usually does. Yesterday it seemed nothing could get me out of my funk. I tried to sweat it out at the gym. I found this recipe for Guinness chocolate cupcakes and tried to bake it out. I tried to nap it out, and finally I tried to drink it out. But at 2 a.m. I was staring at a glass of bourbon and still in a funk.

I guess you can get into a funk for no reason at all, but I think usually it happens when you find yourself in an uncomfortable holding pattern. Perhaps you are stuck in indecision. Or perhaps you know what you want, but you are waiting on someone else to make up their mind and you aren't sure what to do in the meantime. Not wanting to lose my entire weekend to this persistent malaise, I plan to spend today getting at the source of my funk rather than trying to distract myself from it.

Wanda Jackson

2011-01-22T12:47:00.000-08:00

1 part big-haired southern belle
1 part riot grrrl pipes
2 parts rhinestone accessories and leather fringed outfit
---yields rockabilly legend Wanda Jackson

her latest album was produced by Jack White. Check it out on NPR first listen while you still can.

Crocheted dress guards

2011-01-21T11:28:00.000-08:00

Screw knitting a hat. I'm gonna make some of these babies! My granny-inspired bike bling will be the envy of every bike on Mt. Pleasant street. Not a knitter/crocheter? Simeli dress guards are available here for purchase.

Making sauerkraut

2011-01-21T09:45:00.000-08:00

For my February fermentation adventure I will be making sauerkraut. Tja!! Sehr lecker! I figured I better track down the necessary equipment now since the fermentation process itself can take several weeks. Unlike some of my other epicurean pursuits, fermentation requires relatively little equipment. However, the stuff I need (bacteria and large containers) are not items I have on hand.

Step one for making sauerkraut is finding a 5 gallon food safe container to hold the kraut while the anaerobic processes work their magic. I was totally lusting after this stoneware fermentation crock from Harsch, but decided a significantly less pricey food grade plastic bucket would do. If fermentation becomes a regular thing for me, I'll invest in the good stuff, but for now I want to avoid the being the foodie version of a fat 50yr old guy who buys a sweet Italian racing bike, rides it for a month then leaves it in the garage. To that end, I got this bucket for $16 from High Gravity Homebrewing.You can probably find a similar bucket at your local hardware store, just be sure it's food grade!

The FDA requires plastics used in food packaging be of greater purity (no dyes and no recycled plastics) than plastics used for non-food packaging. One reason for this is that foods that are highly acidic or that contain alcohol or fats can leach plastic additives from the packaging or container into the food. Food grade containers have protective barriers that prevent this sort of contamination. Many, but not all, food grade containers have a triangle on the bottom around the number "2" indicating it's made from a type of plastic called HDPE. However, not all HDPE containers are food safe so be sure you only buy one that's labelled "food safe." On a related note, you should also never store food in a container that has been used to store detergents or other chemicals.

More on sauerkraut in 5-7 business days!

Making kefir bread

2011-01-21T07:04:00.000-08:00

In keeping with my tradition of making New Year's Resolutions that challenge me to learn new and interesting things, I decided to spend 2011 learning about food fermentation. In addition to expanding my culinary horizons, I'm learning about an ancient practice that could have some incredibly useful applications to modern day problems involving food security and the environment. Each month I'm working with a different type of fermented food and this month it's all about kefir.

Now that I've learned to make kefir, I thought I would try my hand at cooking with it. I stumbled on this recipe for kefir bread and gave it a whirl last night. As is often the case when I cook, I improvised with the ingredients I had on hand because I was too lazy to go to the grocery store. I ended up using half whole wheat flour and half regular and the recipe turned out just fine. I think the whole wheat flour gives it more texture, plus it's better for you!

This bread was SUPER easy to make and it turned out really well! There is approx 10min of hands on time; the rest of the time the bread just sits there and makes itself (seriously can it be any easier?!) Also this is a great way to use up extra kefir. Since making kefir is a continuous process, I sometimes end up with more on hand than I want to drink.

My bread came out soft, fairly dense, and has a slightly sour taste from the kefir. It's easy to slice which is important if you want to use it to make sandwiches. I had some this morning with some Brummel and Brown's yogurt butter and rasberry jam - Yum! I think it will be super tasty with some melted cheese on top for a snack too.

I have little to no bread-making experience but given how easy this was, I think I will be making more of my own bread in the future. Besides being easy, its also cheap! I got 3 loaves of homemade bread for the cost of 1 store-bought loaf.

Behold the quirky comical genius that is Lunchbreath

2011-01-21T06:38:00.000-08:00

I've been loving Lunchbreath for over a year now and am happy to discovers/his rad art is available on etsy!! However my excitement is tempered by the fact that nothing is currently for sale. Still, you can enjoy s/his hilarious work here.

My foray into fashion blogging

2011-01-19T10:58:00.000-08:00

I wrote for a blog that isn't this one. Does that make me a blogger? Probably not. But anyway, here are two fashion posts I wrote for local D.C blog Dandies & Quaintrelles in advance of the fall Tweed Ride. This event is a TON of fun and I'm already looking forward to it's summer counterpart, the Seersucker Social. I really enjoyed researching and writing these posts and look forward to writing more along the same lines for the StuffThingsJunk style file.

What to Wear to the Tweed Ride: A Guide for the Dapper Dame
Putting it all Together: Various Takes on the Tweed Aesthetic

Eating locally out of season

2011-01-19T09:11:00.000-08:00

Worried about meal monotony come winter? Not a fan of root vegetables? Here are two options for a committed locavore who wants to add variety to meals during the lean winter months

1) Cannning. Here are some recipes and a how-to guide.

2) When your garden or local farmer's market is overflowing with goods in the spring and summer, freeze the extras for later. Here is a handy guide for freezing greens, and another useful blog with info on freezing other types of food. You can also check my blog archive for a random freezing tips.

January's fermentation experiment: making kefir

2011-01-18T12:36:00.001-08:00

What is kefir?
Kefir is a fermented milk drink that originated with shepherds of the North Caucasus region, who discovered that fresh milk carried in leather pouches would occasionally ferment into an effervescent beverage. It is prepared by inoculating milk with kefir grains. Traditional kefir was made in animal skin bags that were hung near a doorway; the bag would be knocked by anyone passing through the doorway to help keep the milk and kefir grains well mixed. Kefir has health benefits similar to yogurt and is excellent for digestion.

How to make kefir

Purchase kefir grains online. I got mine here. Be sure to follow instructions for re-hydrating your grains if they have been dehydrated for packaging and shipping by the seller.
Place grains in clean glass jar. One website suggest adding 8oz milk for every tablespoon of grains, add 7-8 ounces of milk but I didn't measure anything and my kefir turned out fine. I used a large mason jar filled about 3/4 full with milk on top of the kefir grains.
Cover the jar loosely (I use a paper towel secured by a rubber band) and place at room temperature, away from direct sunlight.
Kefir will form in 12-48 hours. It will have a thick consistency similar to drinkable yogurt and it should smell a bit yeasty. If the smell is rotten then something is wrong. If your kefir has separated into curds and whey, it has been sitting too long.
Strain the kefir using a colander with very small holes to separate the grains from the kefir. Cotton muslin bags, such as the type health food stores often sell as reusable tea bags, can be used to contain the kefir grains if you find that straining is too messy or difficult when you are working with small grains. If using this method it is very important to ensure the bag stays submerged in milk as the bag will attract mold.
You can return the kefir grains to the jar used to culture your batch and start the process all over again to make a new batch. Put your new batch of kefir in a sealed container and refrigerate for up to several months.

Two approaches to making kefir

Double fermentation First ferment in the usual way by adding the culture to the milk and leaving for a period of time, 12-24 hours is the norm. Then strain out the culture and leave the kefir out to ferment more slowly for another 12-24 hours before putting it in the fridg
Continuous fermentation Store your kefir in a large jar but don't put it in the fridge. As each new batch is ready it's added to the existing kefir in the main storage jar and then the lid goes on. The kefir will continue to ferment (it's a live food remember) and will get very sour and fizzy. If you feel inclined to try this you must always use a jar with a rubber seal that will allow excess pressure to escape, otherwise you run the risk of explosions!

Caring for kefir grains

A cooler temperature slows the fermentation down and makes a thicker kefir too. Some people like to ferment their kefir in the fridge, leaving it for 5 days or more to compensate for the much slower fermentation process.
Keeping your kefir grains in the fridge regularly can disrupt the yeast/bacteria balance necessary for the kefir grains to function properly make the kefir grains less efficient and reliable.
Spare culture can be stored for a time in a jar in the fridge with some milk. The fermentation will slow right down and you can store them for a few weeks this way. It's a good idea to rotate them with the grains you're using for your regular kefir making so that they get a chance to warm up and restore vitality to their microflora.
To take a break from making kefir for a week, put the grains in the same amount of milk you use to make a batch of kefir and put them in a sealed container in the fridge for a week. If you need more than a week off, be sure to change the milk each week. Don't do this for more than 2-3 months.
Kefir grains can be stored long-term by drying them. Simply rinse the kefir grains with filtered water to remove all milk residue. Lay them on a piece of unbleached parchment paper and set them in a safe place. Kefir grains will generally dry in 2-5 days depending on room temperature and humidity levels. Once the kefir grains are completely dry, they can be stored in a zip lock bag in a cook dry place or the refrigerator. If possible, package the dried grains with a small amount of dried milk powder. In this state, kefir grains will generally survive at least 12 months
The biggest danger with leaving the kefir grains in the same milk for more than 48 hours is that they will generally begin to starve which damages the kefir grains.
It is not necessary to rinse kefir grains between batches unless you suspect they have been contaminated. Kefir grains often work better if they are not rinsed.

Additional notes

If you are culturing multiple products (e.g. different varieties of yogurt, buttermilk, kefir, Kombucha, etc.) be sure to keep a distance of at least several feet between cultures so they don’t cross-contaminate each other. Over time, cross-contamination will weaken the culture.
Kefir which cultures at room temperature for longer than 48 hours can have a laxative effect.
Kefir and kefir grains should not be stirred with or stored in metal other than stainless steel.
Kefir sticking to the grains is normal and does not present a problem. Just remove large quantities and don't worry about smaller layers of kefir that remain on the kefir grains as they go into fresh milk.
The easiest way to find the kefir grains is to first stir the kefir well with a wooden or plastic spoon--you want to homogenized the kefir and break up the coagulated portions. Next, pour the kefir though a fine mesh strainer and gently work the kefir through using your fingers (be sure your hands are washed and rinsed well as both foreign bacteria and soap residue can wreak havoc on kefir grains). This process should allow you to locate the kefir grains as well as homogenized the kefir.
During the culturing process, kefir will generally go through three stages: Liquid milk, thickened liquid (generally the consistency of cultured buttermilk or liquid yogurt), thicker kefir (almost a yogurt consistency in some cases) and finally separated into curds and whey. How quickly the kefir moves through the various stages is a function of several factors including room temperature and the ratio of kefir grains to milk. Kefir that has separated is simply kefir that has over-cultured. It is generally safe to consume over-cutlured kefir provided it looks, tastes and smells okay.

The above information and much more can be found here and here and here and here.

Is compromise a founding principle of our democracy?

2011-01-13T08:27:00.000-08:00

   There was some controversy last week when Congress kicked off it's session with a reading of the Constitution on the House floor. The debate was over which version to read: the original document, or the amended version, in which portions of the original (ex. the 3/5 clause) which were superseded by amendments (the 13th in the case of the 3/5 clause) are not read.
   I think there are legitimate points to be made on both sides regarding the significance of the original text, the value in remembering injustices like the 3/5 clause, and the strange hypocrisy of Republicans, some of whom are committed to repealing the 14th amendment, choosing to read the amended version. Personally I am all for Congress reading the Constitution, and I don't find it particularly odd that they would read the version on which courts and legislators currently rely. But I won't get into all that in this blog post.
   I actually have a more tangential observation to make. The mention of the 3/5 clause got me thinking about compromise. At the time of ratification, slavery was a major issue, as was how to count slaves for purposes of taxation and congressional representation. The debate was intense and it came down to this: do we compromise our principles in order to form a nation, or do we hold our ground? Ultimately compromise prevailed. Less than 100 years after our nation was founded, the 13th amendment was passed rendering the 3/5 clause moot. Of course it was another 100 years plus of civil rights activism before citizenship had any real meaning for African Americans. It took over a hundred years to correct the evil wrought by compromise, yet that struggle has brought us closer in line with other values, ones of freedom and democracy on which our Constitution and our country were formed. So then, is compromise as integral to the function of American democracy as our more esoteric notions of liberty, justice and the pursuit of happiness?
   I would encourage our elected officials to think about that question. The idea of compromise was anathema to the 2010 Congress and I don't foresee chances for agreement improving as the newly elected Tea Partiers ride into town on promises to stand their ground on matters ranging from guns, to healthcare, to earmarks. The fact that newly elected House Speaker John Boehner's proclaimed agenda is one of opposition rather than issues is pretty telling. Compared to the 3/5 compromise, finding common ground on issues like healthcare and same sex marriage seems like a cake-walk. Yet our elected officials (read: Republicans) wave the Constitution and call upon the legacy of our founding fathers, as they themselves refuse to make the sort difficult compromises our founding fathers made to form this country.
   As an admittedly stubborn and opinionated person of principle, I understand the difficulty of working with those with whom you vehemently disagree. But when our elected officials talk about the principles of our founding fathers, I hope they will remember one of those principles is compromise, and that this country wouldn't exist without it.

Giffords shooting discourse misses the mark

2011-01-11T07:14:00.000-08:00

   As much as I dislike Sarah Palin, and find her crosshairs graphic and gun-totin' lingo is objectionable, I don't blame her or the right-wing media for the Giffords shooting. Jared Loughner opened fire on those people because he is a total fucking nut job, and because he was able to get a weapon.
   Why can't a crazy just be a crazy shooter? Why must this random event be a commentary on society and the state of political discourse? Every few years a wack job pops up and tragically opens fire on innocent people. And each time people try to explain it by looking at the failings of society.
   Sure, society and politics contribute in part to these events - after all, crazed gunman are able to carry out their sick ambitions because firearms are practically given away like candy in Walmarts around America (in Virginia they voted NOT to restrict mentally ill persons from getting weapons after the VA Tech shooting -seriously). So yes, society and political factors may allow for crazed gunman to make good on their intentions, but I don't think society necessarily creates these crazed gunmen. SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST CRAZY.
   There have always been crazy people and there always will be. So instead of blaming right wing media and Sarah Palin for actions of the mentally disturbed (and I say this as one who loathes both Palin and right wing media) why don't we focus on fixing the problem that is actually of our own making - laws that allow guns to fall into the hands of the violent and mentally disturbed. Along the same lines, see this excerpt from an interview with Professor of Political Rhetoric Martin J. Medhurst:

"Obviously, this whole discussion has arisen out of Saturday’s shooting of Congresswoman Giffords. Do you see any connection between the violence that occurred over the weekend and the violent political rhetoric we’ve been hearing in the past two years? And can those connections be found historically?

The question has always been: What is the nature of the connection? Is it a causal connection? We have over a half-century of research on violence and media for example and over a half-century of truly exhaustive research. And there has been almost no correlation between portrayals of violence in the media, whether it’s television or film, and the increase of violence in the people who view it.

I would say as far as we can tell there’s not a causal connection here. Now, is there a correlation between the amount of violent, emotional rhetoric in circulation and the propensity of people who are not quite all there to engage in violent action? Maybe, but I don’t know how you would ever prove it. It’s hard to know what is the cause and what is the effect.

Right. They might share an underlying cause without necessarily causing each other.

Yes. The one thing we do know that can be validated is the psychological condition of these people. The one thing that you see that holds constant is that these people have psychological problems. Whether it was the culture or the rhetoric or a particular statement or the time of day or what that actually set them off, we will probably never know. The fact of the matter is they have psychological problems. Normal people do not react to this kind of metaphorical violence in a violent way."

Dear Hiring Manager:

2011-01-11T06:38:00.001-08:00

Dear Hiring Manager:

Thank you for your letter of January 11th. After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your rejection at this time.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. Given the quality and diversity of institutions which have failed to recognize my substantial talents, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite your outstanding record and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my current career needs. Thusly, I refuse to accept the legitimacy of your decision and look forward to seeing you Monday when I show up for work.

Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,

G. Forcewinds

New Year's Resolution 2011: The Year of Fermentation

2011-01-06T07:52:00.000-08:00

I wasn't sure what bizarre thing I would resolve to do this year, and then I stumbled on an article in the December(?) issue of the New Yorker that touched on the subject of food fermentation. It peaked my interest enough to consider devoting 12 months to exploring the subject and trying my hand at fermenting various foods. I plan to blog about my adventures. Knowing pretty much nothing about fermentation, the how-to, history, or benefits of it, I think step one is to do a little reading on the topic. I ordered Wild Fermentation by Sandor Ellix Katz (one of the people interviewed for the New Yorker piece) from Amazon. In the meantime, here are some fun facts about fermentation found on the world wide web...

Random facts about fermentation

Fermentation is the process of converting carbohydrates to alcohols, CO2, or organic acids using yeast, bacteria or a combination thereof under anaerobic conditions.
The science of fermentation is known as zymurgy. Louis Pasteur became the first zymologist in 1854 when he connected yeast to fermentation.
Natural fermentation precedes human history, but humans have been doing it themselves since ancient times

Reasons to ferment food

Enrichment of the diet through development of a diversity of flavors, aromas, and textures in food substrates
Fermentation allows you to preserve food which enhances food security (I suspect developing nations could benefit from this)
Biological enrichment of food substrates with protein, essential amino acids, essential fatty acids, and vitamins
Elimination of antinutrients (natural or synthetic compounds that interfere with absorption of nutrients)
A decrease in cooking times and fuel requirements (yay for the environment!)

80s Video Dating Montage

2011-01-01T12:23:00.000-08:00

Road Trip

2010-12-13T21:06:00.000-08:00

Two days after New Year's, I turn 30. My birthday and New Year's are my least favorite holidays. Given that I've neither found love nor achieved a respectable measure of professional success, I am particularly dreading it this year. My sense of doom loomed large as December crept on, and I decided the only reasonable course of action would be to disappear by myself for a week to some exotic foreign land where I iphones don't work thus rendering me ignorant of the calls people would forget to make on my birthday, and making me unavailable to attend birthday gatherings which would inevitably be poorly attended since people are still out of town, or recovering from the holidays or whatever other lame excuse is traditionally offered.

Just as I was considering the pros and cons of island getways and European towns, a friend familiar with my distress suggested a road trip. Actually he is more of an acquaintance, but what began as a gchat conversation somehow has turned into me and said friend/acquaintance doing an 8 day tour of the American southeast including stops in New Orleans, Austin, Decatur Georgia's Waffle House musuem, various monuments to Elvis, and several Civil War battlegrounds. Given that my friend is a film producer, it's possible that the emotional travails and raucus moonshine-fueled redneck encounters along the way will be captured on film, possibility to be presented at some future film festival as a tragi-comic portrait of a women on the brink of middle age, or possibly a roadside murder mystery? Yikes. I better pick up a handy souvenir at the Spear Hunting Museum along the way, just in case.

Another classic from my tome of bad-dating stories

2010-12-13T07:54:00.000-08:00

I met a guy for drinks over the weekend. I won't go into the spotty history of his behavior prior to said date, but let's just say he has the communication skills of a rhinocerous and should have known he was on shaky ground insofar as my willingness to go out with him again.

We agree to meet for drinks at a wine bar Friday night. After arriving an hour late he orders something pink and bubbly (rose, seriously?) and proceeds to try and defend the notion that Iran is a democratic regime. Not being one to shy away from discussion of politics and/or religion, I engage.

Taking the more widely accepting and factually-based point of view, that Iran is an fact an authoritarian regime led by a crazy man and not a democracy, I point out that Iran's current leader was "elected" through fraud and intimidation and has since imprisoned/exiled/tortured dissidents. Seeing as how free elections and freedom to dissent are cornerstones of democracy, I felt I had made my case. My date however gave me a disgusted look and said "Just stop talking. There is nothing worthwhile coming out of your mouth right now." How's that for flirtatious banter? Check please. I left, walking home in silence. Though I declined his offer to accompany me, he did so anyway and alternated between apologizing and angrily attempting to find fault with me.

The next morning I woke up to find an email from him saying simply "last night was awful." Umm yeah it was. I was annoyed that I had allowed this individual to have such a toxic affect on my mood, one that lingered well into the afternoon. I ultimately sent him a polite and to the point message saying that it is important to me that my relationships have some measure of mutual respect, and that I would prefer not to see him again. He responded: "YOU ARE TOTALLY FUCKING MISREADING THIS. And I think you know it." Like I said, a really great communicator. Nothing screams emotional maturity like typing in all caps and avoiding personal responsibility for insulting another person. Delete.

Moving right along....

On the upside, this tragedy left my Saturday night open for the possibility of new romantic entanglements. And indeed the Retro Ski Party Gods smiled on me that night. As it turns out, some men find purple spandex and turqoise mock turtleneck sweaters from 1985 sexy...okay it was probably the spandex he liked despite the sweater. At any rate, I met a nice boy (attractive too! a rare and wonderful thing here in DC) who walked me home in the rain and didn't even try to take advantage of my rather intoxicated state by inviting himself upstairs. He did however kiss me and tell me I was pretty, which I thought was very nice of him considering I was drunk, soggy from the rainy walk home, and wearing hideous neon clothes. We are having dinner this week and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he doesn't turn out to be a defender of authoritarian regimes, suffer from manorexia, have narcissistic or socio-pathic tendencies, identify as Republican, engage in post-breakup stalking, lie pathologically, have man-boobs or unaddressed back hair issues or otherwise resemble my previous dating debacles. One can only dream.

Tweed-tastic toppers and more

2010-12-07T11:26:00.000-08:00

Herringbone Helmet from Rolling Orange

Lacoste's eco-friendly tweed concept helmet

Yakkay tweed helmets

Polka dot helmet by Ruby

"Sherkock" Deerstalker helmet from Bobbin Bicycles

Nutcase Union Jack helmet from Bobbin Bicycles

Custom phrenology helmet by Bell

Giro brown leather helmet

Fashion Helmet "bianca" from Audere.dk

A multipurpose helmet from Bern

Christopher Walken's dramatic reading of Lady Ga-Ga

2010-11-19T06:37:00.000-08:00

Welcome to the sausage factory

2010-11-03T07:58:00.000-07:00

I saw a rather humorous Craigslist missed connections post in response to last night's election results, and I look forward to reading reports of newly elected Tea Partiers who, upon seeing how the sausage is made, are shocked to discover that the legislative process bears little resemblance to the "Mr Smith Goes to Washington"-esque description from their 8th grade social sciences textbooks. Wait, backroom deals, riders, and earmarks are how congressmen accomplish things for the benefit of their constituents?! Who knew.
Funny how politics have always involved trade-offs and messy compromises, but thanks to the constant glare of the modern media spotlight, people are just now realizing it and blaming whoever happens to be in office for the "corruption" and lack of political integrity. Funny how the same people who complain about these things have in the past re-elected politicians who are notorious pork barrelers and backroom dealers, such as Robert Byrd of West Virginia and Ted Stevens of Alaska. Now dead, both men were notorious for bringing federal dollars home to their districts. While people complained about corruption, they are all to happy to re-elect candidates that were adept at getting things done on the Hill, however off-putting their methods.

The indignation and outrage over the nature of politics is reminiscent of the public reaction to the Lewinsky affair, as if Bill Clinton was the first president to ever dabble in infidelity, when the reality is that he was the first president to be unfaithful in the era when there is a 24 hour news cycle that feeds on scandal and probes relentlessly into the private lives of public figures, whether or not their personal matters relate to what they aim to accomplish as political leaders.

At any rate, it appears the newly elected Teabaggers have a something of a Sophie's choice 1) try to live up to their adorably uninformed "leave it to Beaver" small-town ambitions to "clean up" Washington and get nothing done 2) accept that politics are part of the political process (shocker), tuck tail, and make compromises so they can get shit done for their constituents.

I also can't wait for the one or two CEO's-turned-politicians to realize that being a junior congressman is NOTHING like running a company and that no amount of business savvy is going to enable them to "change Washington" in the manner they misguidedly beleive themselves capable. The American people aren't shareholders who will allow the government to trade social security like poorly performing stock in a portfolio so long as it's good for the bottom line i.e. decreases the deficit. Running a country is not the same as running a business. Sure, a bit of business savvy could come in handy on the Hill, but I think these folks are in for a real shock.

New York Gubernatorial Mad Libs

2010-11-02T07:28:00.000-07:00

On November 2^nd the people of New York will elect a new Governor to serve a four-year (noun) beginning January, 2011. Incumbent Governor David Paterson was elected as Lieutenant (noun) in 2006 as the running mate of former Governor Eliot Spitzer who (verb) after a 2008 prostitution scandal.

A number of (adjective) candidates initially threw their (plural noun) into the ring, including Jimmy McMillan, founder of the Rent is Too Damn High Party[1], and Kristen Davis, madam of the (noun) ring frequented by former Governor Spitzer[2]. But after a (adjective) primary season, two remaining candidates will face off in the general election.

Recent (John Dickerson’s obsession) show Andrew Cuomo, the Democratic candidate and incumbent (political office), in the lead by a wide margin.[3] Cuomo’s opponent is (political party) party nominee, Carl Paladino is a multi-millionaire (noun) developer who won a (adjective) victory over Republican candidate Rick Lazio in the GOP primary. The two candidates have little in common aside from their common cultural ancestry. Cuomo, though proud of his heritage, is concerned about the political liabilities attached to stereotypes associated with his ethnic identity; Cuomo once (verb that is John Dickerson’s fascination) state voters about their views of (popular mafia TV show) to clean insight into their perceptions of Italian-Americans.[4]

The raucus contest between Paladino and Cuomo has the New York’s (ethnic group negatively portrayed on the show Jersey Shore) community wondering whether the race is shattering long-held ethnic stereotypes or reinforcing them. [5] A printable flyer[6] sent to Paladino’s campaign email list depicts an image of Cuomo in the shower covered in dirt, wearing nothing but a (piece of jewelry worn by mobsters) with the phrase “Clean up Albany? Start with Cuomo.” Paladino shook off accusations of racism, calling himself an equally opportunity offender who is just as likely to insult (racial slur for African-Americans) and (plural homophobic epithet) as his fellow Italians.

Paladino is a (adjective) candidate to say the least. He prompted a media firestorm when he threatened to (violent action) a reporter from the New York Post. Paladino has proven equally provocative in expressing his stance on various issues: he has admitted to forwarding racist[7] (plural noun); he has compared healthcare reform to (unprecedented American tragedy)[8]; and he has suggested that welfare recipients should (verb) in prisons, where they can learn about

[1] http://rentistoodamnhigh.org/id85.html

[2] http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/03/09/kristin-davis-on-ny-gover_n_491745.html

[3] http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/11/gillibrand-cuomo-new-york-polls_n_757751.html

[4] http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/11/nyregion/11italian.html

[5] http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/11/nyregion/11italian.html

[6] http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/archives/2010/09/state_politics.php

[7] http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2010/04/carl_paladino_watches_bestiali.html

[8] http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2010/03/guy_who_wants_to_run_new_york.html

Basket case

2010-11-01T08:59:00.000-07:00

A traditional wicker basket from velorbis is perfect for a cruise in the English countryside.

Stand out with colorful eco-conscious acoutrement from Cycle Chic.

Sleek Danish handiwork from Copenhagen Parts, perfect for the urban minimalist.

Meditations on life from Marcel the Shell

2010-10-25T13:17:00.000-07:00

"Guess what I do for adventure? I hang glide on a Dorito."

"Sometimes i like to tie lint to a piece of hair and drag it around...lint is a shell's best friend"

Bowie on youtube, or what I did at work this morning

2010-10-25T09:05:00.000-07:00

Heroes: inspirational sexy beast Bowie.

Young Americans: rockabilly hair and crazy shoulder pads Bowie.

Space Oddity: silver spandex space-Bowie in slow motion.

TVC15: anorexic stewardess Bowie.

Ashes to Ashes: Wizard of Oz goes to Mars with trannie nuns Bowie.

Ziggy Stardust: sexy kimono and thigh-high boots Bowie in 1973.

Time: one armed bodysuit Bowie.

The Jean Genie: hands on boobies Bowie

Oh! You Pretty Things: beautiful bone structure Bowie.

Skeletons in the Plantation House Closet

2010-10-06T09:38:00.000-07:00

Did you hear about the federal judge who got caught buying coke from a stripper? Turns out he's one of my relatives. A distant relative perhaps (morally distant for sure) but I am in fact related to him through my grandmother on my mom's side.

In the South, having few skeletons in the family closet can be a point of pride. As my favorite designing woman Julia Sugarbaker once pointed out "...this is the South. And we're proud of our crazy people. We don't hide them up in the attic. We bring 'em right down to the living room and show 'em off. ...no one in the South ever asks if you have crazy people in your family. They just ask what side they're on."

But not all crazy is created equal. My crazy relative who shot a judge on the courthouse steps a couple hundred years ago, or the twice-divorced suffragette who smoked cigars and taught her nephews to play poker, or the one who caused a stir when he left his estate in equal parts to his black and white mistresses back before blacks had even the right to vote, are somehow in a different category than a corrupt federal judge who bought coke from a stripper.

All are characters for sure, but there's something noble about the scandalous lives of the first three that is notably lacking in this latest tale of a family ne'er do well. His scandal was one of selfish indulgence and hypocrisy. The others, though they ran afoul of public sentiment at the time and/or the law, were scandalous because they stood up for something they believed in.

Jack Camp, on the other hand, was a tough-on-crime judge by day who, when nobody was watching, engaged in the same behavior that would earn a defendant a maximum sentence in his courtroom. Not even in the South, where we pride ourselves in our colorful kin, are folks proud to have a relative like that. Judge Camp is one skeleton I'm content to leave in the closet.

What do you do

2010-09-16T08:47:00.000-07:00

What do you do when you love someone and want to tell them things - things you experience, things they'd find funny, how you feel etc. - but you can't because they are in love with someone else? That's the worst. All the unsaid things accumulate inside until you want to explode.

Yet an explosion of poorly timed confessions is not likely to make your former love come running back to you. So what do you do? Write letters. Putting your thoughts into words releases some that pent-up emotional turmoil. But, instead of sending your letters to the object of your affection, send them to yourself. Yeah, yeah it sounds like talking to yourself, but its pretty therapeutic.

And if you want, you can even fantasize about the person reappearing one day to declare his love for you, you giving him the letters and him being deeply moved by your sentimental gesture. But yeah, that's probably not gonna happen.

Whether or not that person re-enters your life, sorting out your feelings is good thing not only for your own sanity but also for the sake of future relationships. I find that the older I get and more I date, the more I accumulate dreaded "baggage." But at a certain point you have to unpack and move on, even if that means writing love letters to yourself.

Eid and 9-ll

2010-09-11T07:54:00.000-07:00

   I have heard Americans complain over and over that moderate Muslims don't do enough to publicly condemn extremism. These same people tend to use that line to justify their condemnation of Islam as an extreme religion.
   I hope those folks realize what is happening across America today in many Muslim communities. Today is Eid which is kind of like their Christmas Day. Because Eid falls on 9-11 this year (it follows the lunar calendar and thus is on a different day each year), many Muslims are holding off on celebrating their holiday until tomorrow.
   Can you imagine moving Christmas!? I can hear the Fox News "war on Christmas" reports already. Suffice to say, it's no small gesture. By moving the celebration of this holy holiday, moderate Muslims are making a profound public statement about their identity not just as Muslims, but Muslim Americans. In delaying their celebration, Muslims are distancing themselves from the extremists responsible for 9-11 by reserving what would otherwise be joyous day of religious celebration, as one of reflection and solemnity and remembrance of this tragedy.
   I have known Muslim friends, professors and coworkers who've experienced discrimination, who have been labelled as unwelcome outsiders in their own country because of the actions of extremists who subscribe to a version of Islam radically different from their own. If people continually labelled me a terrorist because I was Muslim, or of middle-eastern descent, or simply brown I would be pretty pissed off. I certainly wouldn't be inclined to move a sacred holiday in hopes these idiots might finally recognize my people aren't the bad guys. And so I am touched by this gesture on the part of American Muslims and hope that it doesn't go unnoticed by those who would question their faith and allegiance to this country.

Why it's time to stop talking about Sarah Palin

2010-09-08T13:45:00.000-07:00

1) There isn’t much left to say. Michael Gross’ profile of Palin for the October 2010 issue of Vanity Fair pretty much reiterates what we already knew about her (especially if you read Game Change) – that she’s ruthlessly ambitious, manipulative, routinely lies about things, has a terrible temper, etc. In fact, Gross’ profile regurgitates many of the same observations made in an August 2009 Vanity Fair profile of Palin. The discussion of Palin’s significance as a political figure and what it says about American politics and culture is pretty stale by now. The one interesting tidbit mentioned in the latest Vanity Fair profile (the bit about Palin’s shady funding operations) apparently wasn’t a lead worth chasing down – or so Gross’ brevity on the subject would suggest. The redundancies in media discussion of Palin (at Vanity Fair and beyond) beg the question, what else is left to say about her as a person and as a political force?

2) Palin is not going to run for president in 2012. News of her plans to headline the GOP’s Reagan Day dinner in Iowa in September and to host an event on 9/11 with Glenn Beck inspired media speculation about Palin’s 2012 presidential ambitions. Palin isn’t ramping up her staff or taking advantage of opportunities (and she’s had some) to fill the gaps in her qualifications by, for example, meeting with high profile foreign dignitaries. But why fight the rumors?! Palin is perfectly content to let the politerati to speculate as it boosts her media profile (and keeps the cash flowing. , all signs point to her not running. As New York Magazine observed, “[h]er flirtation with presidential politics is a big part of her appeal in the national media... As long as her intentions remain an open question, Palin's prominence on the national stage is assured.” If Palin’s media career and political influence is contingent on being in the media spotlight – what happens the media stops talking about her?

3) Talking about Palin mostly benefits Palin. Though Gross’s Vanity Fair piece touches on potentially interesting stories involving Palin’s questionable funding operations, the bulk of the piece is a series of unflattering anecdotes from anonymous sources, some of which are “wildly embellished” or downright untrue. Because of this, Gross’s piece plays into Palin’s hands allowing her label his piece (including the accurate parts) as a “hatchet job” on the part of the “lamestream media” which only enhances her credibility with her base. While Palin may want to make us scream, talking about her only adds fuel to the fire.

So what's a Palin weary world to do? Just stop talking. Think of Palin like a mosquito bite, the more you scratch it the more it itches. If we stop scratching, eventually she will stop annoying us. Yes, there will still be Tea Baggers (and mosquitos) out there but we don't have to let them bring us down.

Dear OBGYN's:

2010-08-27T07:26:00.000-07:00

Not everyone with a vagina is planning to have a baby. The childless women waiting patiently to be probed with your cold metal instruments would like something other than parenting magazines to read.

Sincerely,
Without Child in the Waiting Room

Ken Mehlman flips the script on the typical gay GOP drama

2010-08-25T21:51:00.000-07:00

   Typically, stories about the outing of closeted Republicans involve scandalous "Focus on the Family" types found in compromising scenarios. This is perhaps because the GOP (AKA party of hate) tends to alienate the self-accepting gays leaving only the disturbed and repressed to eventually crumble under the weight of their own hypocrisy, only to be outed while playing footsie in a bathroom or soliciting minors via RentBoy.
   Ken Mehlman, President Bush's campaign manager in 2004 and a former chairman of the Republican National Committee, represents a refreshing departure from this disturbing narrative. After 43 years of painful silence, Mehlman came out to his family and associates.
   According to The Atlantic Monthly, "Mehlman acknowledges that if he had publicly declared his sexuality sooner, he might have played a role in keeping the party from pushing an anti-gay agenda." For Mehlman, I say better late than never. For other gays hiding out in the GOP, I hope Mehlman's regrets don't become your own. If you have the balls to be gay and Republican, then have the balls to come out and to speak out when your party ventures (as it increasingly has in recent years) down the wrong path.  Hopefully Mehlman will pave the way for other closeted Republicans to come out for themselves, and reclaim their party from the homophobic religious right.

A question about questions

2010-08-11T10:23:00.000-07:00

According to the New York Times, 53% of registered voters in NYC do not think the Cordoba Islamic Center should be built near ground zero. What the article did not say is what exactly pollsters asked people. Were people asked how they feel about someone building a "mosque at ground zero?” Or were they asked how they feel about someone building a 15 story YMCA-esque complex including a pool, and auditorium, in addition to a prayer space located several blocks from ground zero? I am guessing responses differ depending on how the question is asked.

The courage of their convictions

2010-08-09T12:29:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, when it was slightly more oppressively hot than it is this week, I observed an interesting phenomenon en route to pick up a prescription from CVS. During my 5 block journey I encountered several groups of latino evangelicals proselytizing door-to-door, a pair of mormon missionaries, and an older gentleman seeking signatures to get a socialist candidate on the ballot for a local election*. By contrast, nobody was out having drinks on patios or shooting the shit on the corner like usual. While the rest of us took shelter indoors, the heat seemed to have the opposite effect on the community of believers, igniting the fires of passion for various causes and fanning the flames of conviction.

There's probably some larger point to be made here. I'm sure a more insightful person, or perhaps someone who uses a lot of recreational drugs, could extrapolate my observations into an erudite commentary pertaining to behavioral psychology, politics and religion. Until that thunderbolt of wisdom strikes, I leave you with this: Think twice before answering the door on a hot day. They might be looking to convert you.

* I did sign the petition - not because I'm socialist but because I support civic participation and feel disillusioned by our lame two-party democracy.

Dear Cologne-Drenched Coworker

2010-07-30T12:33:00.000-07:00

While I appreciate your desire to mask the rancid stench of cigarette smoke that saturates your bland office attire and emanates from your mouth with each phlegm-rattling cough, dousing yourself in bad cologne prior to returning from your smoke breaks is not helpful. Thanks to your repeated olfactory offense, I am having migraines. As a general rule, if people can smell you before they see you (and we can) it is a sign that you are wearing too much.

In addition to the quantity of fragrance you wear, I would like to address its quality. While person's scent is his/her own prerogative, I feel compelled to bring to your attention that you smell like a high school boy. Davidoff's Coolwater, Axe products, scents designed by celebrities and anything sold by Abercrombie & Fitch is inappropriate for a man your age and anyone else over the age of 17. May I suggest you consider more mature subtle fragrance: Better yet, just stick to the scent of your dryer sheets ( I recommend Bounce outdoor fresh) until you attract a woman who can help you select an appropriate fragrance and instruct you on proper usage.

Your immediate attention to these matters would be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Air Quality Control Representative of 11th floor Employees

Things I'm strangely obsessed with

2010-07-09T17:18:00.000-07:00

pirate eyepatches
bourbon
craigslist missed connections
costumes
hedgehogs

Things American culture could do without

2010-07-01T13:24:00.000-07:00

Ed Hardy anything
chemical versions of actual food e.g. "cheese product" as opposed to actual cheese
large bodies stuffed into tiny clothes
the Jersey shore and it's inhabitants (though they are appreciated for comic value)
puritanical notions about sex
the concept of super-sizing
confederate flags
the symbiotic relationship between urban sprawl and gas guzzling vehicles large enough to transport the food, toys, clothes, and entertainment required to entertain occupants between points A and B
chain restaurants, big box stores and the cultural voids the create in small town America
South Carolina politicians
the idea that a salad consists of iceberg lettuce and a couple of larger than bite-size chunks of mealy tomato

Deciphering the Drone

2010-07-01T13:07:00.000-07:00

   Listening to universal complaints about mind-numbing drone of South African vuvuzelas in the background of the world cup matches, I have noticed that often commentators refer not to "vuvuzelas, a traditional South African instrument," but to "vuvuzelas, the cheap plastic horn beloved by South African soccer fans." Some folks (mostly Northern Californians I'm guessing) have taken issue with calls for a ban on the vuvuzela, claiming that such a ban is culturally insensitive. Had the media described the vuvuzela as a "traditional instrument," thereby evoking the images of tribal culture, folk art, and symbolic rebellion against imposed euro-centric colonial traditions that appeals to Whole Foods shoppers, believers in herbal medicine, yoga enthusiasts, and other culturally sensitive types, opposition to calls for a vuvuzela ban would have been much greater. I say this not as a critique of the media, which correctly recognized that, while regionally popular, a plastic instrument is not traditional cultural artifact, but to point out the importance of language in shaping public perception and response.
   Just as the drone of the vuvuzela eventually blends in with the sounds of the match, the drone of media reports can lull the public into believing a version of events that has been bandied about the media echo chamber until it resembles something like a "fact." It's funny how a story, told often enough, seems true. I don't intend to label the mainstream media as purveyors of falsehoold - I am no Breitbart disciple or "liberal media" skeptic. My point is that the story that is told, is not always the only story or the most important story.
These days media are under such intense pressure to scoop one another, that printing the first story sometimes wins out over printing a better (i.e. more completely researched) story. While they can be convenient, news aggregator sites (Huffington Post or Fluent News for example) can exacerbate the problem. Readers who see a story in the AP or Reuters, then turn to a news aggregator site where the same story is posted under a different headline may perceive the story as bigger news than it really is. When the same story pops up on numerous sites also creates a false impression of consensus.
   Another issue is that certain news outlets, Politico in Washington for example or the NYT nationally, have an incredible amount of power in determining the narrative i.e. deciding what the public should consider "important." These papers don't tell us all the stories and let us decide what matters, they (in conjunction with the White House and political power players) pick out what's important and other less influential papers echo that narrative. It is increasingly difficult to be an intelligent media consumer, that is to say, it's much harder these days to diversify your sources in order to form a well-informed opinion. You can change the channel and still be watching the news according to Rupert Murdoch. You can pull up another website and read the same story posted on 10 other sites. So what’s an independent thinker to do? Read. Read more than one source. Get to know which papers, websites, or journalists take left or right views on certain issues and read them both. Check the blogs that aren’t so mainstream to see what the Big Media aren’t picking up on.

Companionate Relationships

2010-06-29T14:26:00.000-07:00

The more common (though not exactly pedestrian...yet) term is "companionate marriage." But, since not all committed couples are allowed to marry and since I myself am not married (though no less interested in egalitarian relationships), I am slightly modifying the term to encompass committed relationships of the non-marital variety.

So what are the features of a companionate relationship? According to The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts by Judith S. Wallerstein and Sandra Blakeslee (which I have not read but found quoted online) they include...

equality of men and women

belief that both partners (regardless of gender) have equal responsibility in all domains of the relationship

partners who recognize the importance of self-awareness and self-confidence

belief that shared values, trust, friendship and commitment are essential to success of the relationship

belief that both partners sexual needs should be clearly articulated and fulfilled

Sounds like common sense right? It's not. My personal expectations matched the above definition before I ever heard the term "companionate marriage," however my ideals are not exactly in step with the mainstream. Many women I know still expect men to pay for things, even if they are totally financially independent and capably of paying themselves. Mothers are more likely than fathers to take time away from work to tend to children or family responsibilities. Despite the enactment of FMLA during the Clinton administration, men are still reluctant to take leave they are entitled to when children are born due to social pressures and the very real threat of professional repercussions.

My mother's generation faced the pressure of working the "second shift," in that they not only were expected to be independent wage earners but were also expected to continue doing traditionally female duties like cooking, cleaning, and caring for the children. While expectations for women have changed in recent decades, expectations for men have been slower to evolve. I don't know any stay-at-home Dad's of my parent's generations. Thankfully, young couples of my generation are increasingly breaking free of gendered expectations in relationships by sharing child and family responsibilities, balancing career and family life responsibilities, and splitting the check on dates. Living in an urban environment, I know plenty of companionate couples (even if they don't use that term) but i'm well aware that such ideals aren't the norm in our society.

But it's not just persistence of old-school norms that compete with the notion of companionate marriage. Some modern women thinkers/writers call into question the idea of shared power in a relationship and question notions of long-term commitment. Writing for Double X, Hanna Rosin rejects the idea that companionate marriage can be distilled into a choice between security and passion.. "This 'choice,' Rosin write, "is less something that plagues the whole of womankind than an affliction of artists, and it reappears in various forms. It strikes me as a subtle variation on the equally false choice between madness/creativity and sanity/dullness." I agree with Hanna; companionship doesn't have to be boring and valuing family and egalitarian commitment does not imply a step back for women.

Though doubted by adherents to archaic gender norms and modern skeptics alike, I think the companionate relationship model represents a way forward for those of my generation who seek a fulfilling egalitarian alternative.

Professional revelations

2010-06-23T11:42:00.000-07:00

I have realized that irreverence is a key feature of my future job description. I feel most comfortable in irreverent environments. Irreverence is a crucial component to my overall outlook on life and therefore I am best equipped to contribute in an irreverent work environment and/or to work that is itself irreverent. I prefer both.

If I can use my irreverent tendencies for good (e.g. witty informative political commentary) then perhaps it will reduce the frequency with which I make ill-time irreverent comment in social settings or to strangers while taking public transit.

My quest for professional irreverence is looking up, as last night whilst cruising the Potomac on a ridiculously fancy yacht, I became acquainted with someone who swears I am "peas in a pod" with his irreverent political journalist neighbor and wants to introduce us. I also recently met someone who created and manages a highly irreverent political blog. Go me. Let the sassy talk begin.

Slow food recipe roundup

2010-06-17T07:17:00.000-07:00

Here are a few of the recipes I have tried in the past few weeks. All feature local food as the main ingredient

1. I made pot roast using local, ethically raised pork delivered courtesy of Arganica. I used this recipe from Paula Deen; it was super easy and incredibly tasty. She says to use 2 or 3 bullion cubes, but I would stick to 2. I also added celery and carrots.

2. Greens are in season here in the southeast, and this recipe for greens with cannellini beans from epicurious.com works great for spinach, mustard greens, and chard. The made this dish Tuesday night using mustard greens and spinach from the Dupont farmer's market and was blown away by the superior quality of local spinach compared to the greens from Harris Teeter.

3. Tonight I plan to beat the heat using a recipe for yogurt cucumber soup from the Animal, Vegetable, Miracle website. I don't have the equipment for making yogurt at home (easy to do if you have the right stuff) so I will use store bought yogurt and cucumbers from the farmer's market.

Happy cooking!

Tilo Ahmels seat covers

2010-06-10T12:59:00.000-07:00

Ego Tourism: On Manhood and Motorcades

2010-06-10T11:40:00.000-07:00

I believe there is an inverse relationship between the size of a dignitary's penis and the motorcade and amount of weaponry required to transport him from one place to another. Not being inclined to date men who insist on travelling so ostentatiously, I have not personally observed the nether-regions of such gentlemen. Though I cannot verify the accuracy of my theory, I can confirm the absurdity of the ridiculous motorcade I spotted walking past the the Ritz Carlton on the way to my office today.

Ostensibly the presence of armed guards with automatic weapons, the fleet of black sedans, and police escort with screaming sirens was to protect this particularly important gentleman from bodily harm so that he may continue to do whatever indispensable task he performs on behalf of the human race.

I witnessed this sainted man's arrival on our blessed Virginian soil from my humble vantage point on the sidewalk, where I was asked by policeman to wait until the motorcade has passed by. We wretched proletariat who are forced to walk from one place to another, occasionally encountering the volatile elements of the harsh natural world, stood in awe of his sleek bullet-proof armed transport, entirely forgetting the menial tasks awaiting our attention once the police signaled that we were once again free go about our personal business.

While being force to observe this spectacle, it occurred to me that the guns and flashing lights functioned less as a protective cover and more as neon billboard alerting the numerous individuals wanting to kick his pansy ass to his whereabouts. If his goal is to get safely from one place to another, Mr. Fancypants should dispense with the motorcade and opt for a Volvo, some pleated khaki pants and a polo shirt. That way he would look like every other schmuck in Washington, DC and evade his (undoubtedly numerous) enemies unnoticed, and unscathed. But I'm guessing Mr. Important's high profile arrival was actually less about safety and more about ego.

It's too bad the ego is intangible in nature, because this guy's was certainly large enough to plug the Gulf oil gusher.

Resources for the slow foodie

2010-06-07T12:15:00.000-07:00

http://www.slowfooddc.org/

http://www.slowfoodusa.org

Locavore - an iphone app that tells you what's in seasons wherever you are

What is a locavore and why eat locally?

2010-06-01T12:02:00.000-07:00

Ultrastrict locavores avoid all ingredients that have not been grown and produced locally. Marco Polo rule followers incorporate dried spices into their diet -- items sailors could carry along while at sea -- but keep all other ingredients local. Wild card locavores are less restrictive. They bend their foodshed to include coffee, sugar, chocolate or any ingredients they feel they just can't live without.The wild card locavore diet is the movement's most accessible. Some locavores rationalize their coffee fix by purchasing only beans that have been certified fair trade.

Here are some of the most commonly cited reasons people chose to "go local:"

To support local farms and give back to the local economy
To discover new foods (ever heard of garlic scapes? they are local and delicious in pesto!)
To reduce your ecological footprint.
Because it tastes better! A vine-ripened tomato from a local farm is hands down tastier than a tomato that was picked while green and ripened with ethylene then trucked across the country to the local supermarket.
To support local food economies as an alternative to global corporate food markets
Because it eliminates the need for chemical preservatives and irradiation to artificially extend food shelf-life

Terrorists, guns, and the 4th Amendment

2010-05-06T08:45:00.000-07:00

John McCain, Lindsey Graham and others on the right have criticized authorities for mirandizing terror suspects claiming that they won’t confess if mirandized and that we should not afford such rights to terror suspects (nevermind the whole innocent until proven guilty concept). These arguments don’t amount to much given that:

1) both the Christmas Day bomber and Shahzad were mirandized and, according to authorities, provided useful information thereafter. Shahzad has even confessed! Oh yeah, and there's also the Zazi, the would-be subway bomber (thwarted by Obama's allegedly lax policies on terror) who PLED GUILTY and was convicted IN A COURT OF LAW. In fact, we have been far more successful convicting terrorists in a court of law than in the military tribunals advocated by the right.

2) suspects MUST be mirandized if we want to use their confession in court to convict them of the alleged crimes. But, that last point is less relevant if you take the anti-law enforcement approach (i.e. throw the Constitution out the window) advocated by McCain and others on the right. Interesting how war-hawk nationalists talk about “spreading democracy” (usually by invasion) then promptly discard democratic principles when faced with a real or perceived threat.

And how absurd is it that the right is concerned about the implications of affording terrorists Fourth Amendment rights but is totally ok with giving them Second Amendment rights?! Thankfully Mayor Bloomberg of N.Y. called out this constitutional hypocrisy before a Senate panel where he requested congressional support to close the "terror gap" in the nation's gun laws, which currently allow persons on a federal terrorist watch list to buy guns and explosives legally in the United States

Single speed stallion

2010-04-28T13:06:00.001-07:00

Buke & Gass

2010-04-28T11:26:00.000-07:00

check out their story on Radiolab

2 people + 1 buke (a bass ukelele), 1 gass (a guitar/bass hybrid) + ankle bells = a crazy cool sound.

Gay adoption

2010-04-25T11:50:00.001-07:00

Conservatives and the holier-than-thou types that laud the virtues of the "traditional" family i.e. a heterosexual couple are generally opposed to gay adoption, claiming that children are better off when raised by straight parents in a conventional home. To combat that claim, there is ample research showing that children raised by homosexual parents fare just as well as those raised by heterosexual parents, and are no more likely to be gay than children of heterosexual couples.
On a recent edition of his podcast, Dan Savage pointed out that the children up for adoption are children that were born to and subsequently abandoned, abused or neglected by straight people, not gays. The reason there are so many kids up for adoption to begin with is that so many straight people are crappy parents! I would love to point that out next time I hear a self-righteous heterosexual who opposes gay adoption get on his/her soapbox to praise the superiority of heterosexual morals and parenting.

Arganica: bringing ethical locally farmed foods to my front door

2010-04-21T07:59:00.000-07:00

On the recommendation of a friend, I signed for a free month of food delivery from Arganica, a local food delivery club. Starting March, 6th I will have fresh humanely raised meat, dairy, and veg products brought to my front door! If this deal is as good as it sounds like it is, I plan to get a few neighborhood friends on board for partner memberships.

Why it's cool

it's not a CSA meaning that instead of being sent a box of stuff I may or may not want, I get to pick my products
the order form identifies the food providers which allows me to check that they are certified according to my personal ethical standards
they deliver to my front door!
they have amazing variety: bread, spreads, dairy, meat, seafood etc
they include free foodie magazines in the delivery and let members tour the farm
they will recycle my bottles and compost my scraps when they pick up the empty crate
they use locally farmed products
they have animal shares

Fashion DIY

2010-04-21T07:00:00.000-07:00

Pretty sure I can (and should) create these from items currently in my closet

What do hipsters have in common with British gentry?

2010-04-20T13:31:00.000-07:00

I noticed recently that the groups houses in Columbia Heights, Mount Pleasant and the Petworth corridor are often known by names like "The Hermitage," or "The Crab's Claw." I was wondering where this house-naming trend began and did some research. It all started with British aristocrats. The names for their manors or castles were often based on the location of the property or its connection to a particular person. For example, the Lord of 'Pumpernickel Manor' might have have several properties tied to his estate. Pumpernickel Hall, Pumpernickel Lodge, Pumpernickel Cottages, The Dairy, The Barn, The Forge etc would likely be found within walking distance of the Manor House. Eventually tradesmen and merchants started naming their homes too, often for some distinguishing feature e.g. "Rose Cottage" or "River View." I'm not sure how or when the trend was picked up by DC hipsters, but I have to say I'm a fan. Henceforth, my apartment shall be known as "The Shoebox," thanks to its intimate size and the unusual odors that occasionally waft in from neighboring apartments with elderly residents (mothballs) and/or inventive cooks.

Skinny ties = irresistible

2010-04-20T07:10:00.000-07:00

I love this professional-meets-picnic look. Yum.

Fashion obsession: oxford wingtips for women

2010-04-19T10:42:00.000-07:00

Boutique9

Bloomingdales

J.CrewJeffrey Campbell

Steve Madden

Nice rack.

2010-04-19T06:35:00.001-07:00

Portmanteau

2010-04-18T11:50:00.000-07:00

noun. A word that is a linguistic blend of two or more words and their meanings. It can also be created by attaching a prefix or suffix from one word to give that association to other words.

The usage of the word "portmanteau" in this sense first appeared in Lewis Carroll's book Through the Looking Glass in which Humpty Dumpty explains to Alice the coinage of the unusual words in Jabberwocky, where "slithy" means "lithe and slimy" and "mimsy" is "flimsy and miserable."

Examples:

Spanglish (a hybrid language composed of Spanish and English)

Bennifer (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez as a couple)

Brunch (breakfast and lunch)

Monicagate (the watergate-ish scandal involving Monica Lewinsky)

But I'm still not sure what the difference is between a portmanteau and a neologism. Anyone got a clue?

How to freeze strawberries

2010-04-18T10:24:00.001-07:00

http://lunchinabox.net/2008/02/03/freeze-green-onions-in-plastic-drink-bottles/

A great way to take advantage of 2 for 1 berry specials

Can I freeze green onions?

2010-04-17T12:44:00.000-07:00

Yep. http://lunchinabox.net/2008/02/03/freeze-green-onions-in-plastic-drink-bottles/

High rollers

2010-04-17T06:29:00.000-07:00

I'm digging the rolled jeans look for men this Summer. The loafers and short sleeved button down are a nice compliment to these casual, bike-friendly pants.

Putting space in it's place

2010-04-15T07:38:00.000-07:00

I was so excited to hear the news that NASA's moon program and similarly absurd Constellation program will be cancelled in favor of diverting resources to less stupid causes. Finally, we will no longer be wasting so much money in outer space and can finally turn attention to more pressing matters here on earth.

Even though “indoor kids” needs jobs too, the government shouldn’t spend billions on a space program to employ science geeks; surely aspiring astronauts can rely on their science backgrounds to find alternative employment in the private sector. Besides, what have astronauts done other than hand us a symbolic cold war victory decades ago? Sure they invented Tang, but in the age of crystal light, that stuff is pretty low on the totem pole of powdered beverages. Additionally, astronauts are known to engage in questionable behaviors like driving cross country in a diaper under the influence of romantic delusions, and eating freeze-dried foods.

On behalf of my fellow earthlings who think our political and financial resources are better spent on earthly issues like poverty, peace, disease, and human rights: thanks Obama administration!!

Awesome idea of the day

2010-04-14T07:13:00.000-07:00

Using baking soda in lieu of expensive facial exfoliators. It totally works. It's totally cheap.

Best. Peanut Butter. Ever.

2010-04-13T09:35:00.000-07:00

The flax seeds are crunchy bits of magic mixed in a puree of awesomeness.

The way folks talk down yonder

2010-04-12T10:19:00.000-07:00

In honor of my Southern heritage I have composed a list of sayings from the South. Future Virginia governors would be wise to consider honoring our linguistic heritage rather than the history of the confederacy. There ain't enough magnolias and sweet tea in the world to obscure some evils. However, Southern language has its roots in the various ethnic and cultural traditions of the South and is therefore something we can all be proud of.

1. Over yonder (over there)

2. Useless as teats on a boar pig (reference to a bad worker)

3. He ain't got a pot to pee in (to be very poor)

4. You plant a tater, you get a tater (you get what you pay for)

5. He's nuttier than a squirrel turd

6. She could eat an apple through a picket fence (having equine facial features)

7. As easy as sliding off a greasy log backward

8. Barking up the wrong tree (looking for something in the wrong place)

9. Caught with your pants down (caught unaware)

10. I do declare (usually means nothing)

11. In high cotton (rising up in society)

12. In a coon's age (a long time)

13. Too big for his britches (someone who takes himself too seriously)

14. She looks like she was born down wind from the outhouse (not attractive)

15. Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day (pick your battles wisely)

16. She looks like she fell face-down in the sticker patch and cows ran over her (not attractive)

17. He's about as sharp as a mashed potato (an idiot)

18. It's about as scarce as bird crap in a cuckoo clock

19. Meaner than a skilletful of rattlesnakes

20. I'll beat you so bad you'll feel like you were ate by wolves and shit over a cliff.

21. He's so confused he doesn't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his ass.

22. She was as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs

23. Hot as a two-dollar whore on the 4th of July (see e.g. Angela Jolie)

24. Her hair looks like it caught on fire and somebody put it out with a brick

25. He's tougher than a two dollar steak

26. Like a bump on a log (lazy and doing nothing)

27. Like two peas in a pod (people who act and think alike)

28. He's got molasses in his britches (means you're lazy)

Don't forget to give your body what it needs when you switch to a plant based diet

2010-04-12T09:19:00.000-07:00

Here are nutrients that may be deficient in a vegetarian diet and how you can get these nutrients from nonmeat sources:

Protein. Your body needs protein to maintain healthy skin, bones, muscles and organs. Vegetarians who eat eggs or dairy products have convenient sources of protein. Other sources of protein include soy products, meat substitutes, legumes, lentils, nuts, seeds and whole grains.
Calcium. This mineral helps build and maintain strong teeth and bones. Low-fat dairy foods and dark green vegetables, such as spinach, turnip and collard greens, kale, and broccoli, are good sources of calcium. Tofu enriched with calcium and fortified soy milk and fruit juices are other options.
Vitamin B-12. Your body needs vitamin B-12 to produce red blood cells and prevent anemia. This vitamin is found almost exclusively in animal products, including milk, eggs and cheese. Vegans can get vitamin B-12 from some enriched cereals, fortified soy products or by taking a supplement that contains this vitamin.
Iron. Like vitamin B-12, iron is a crucial component of red blood cells. Dried beans and peas, lentils, enriched cereals, whole-grain products, dark leafy green vegetables, and dried fruit are good sources of iron. To help your body absorb nonanimal sources of iron, eat foods rich in vitamin C — such as strawberries, citrus fruits, tomatoes, cabbage and broccoli — at the same time you consume iron-containing foods.
Zinc. This mineral is an essential component of many enzymes and plays a role in cell division and in the formation of proteins. Good sources of zinc include whole grains, soy products, nuts and wheat germ.

Source: Mayo Clinic

Oysters: a vegan friendly food?

2010-04-12T08:04:00.001-07:00

This article in Slate has me convinced.

How to open a bottle of champagne with a sword

2010-04-09T11:36:00.000-07:00

Instructive video here.

Vegan DC

2010-04-09T08:02:00.000-07:00

VegDC is an awesome resource for people in search of vegan and vegetarian friendly restaurants!

A few more recommendations:

Pumpernickel Deli where you can find vegan soy cheese pizza that's just as greasy as regular pizza
the veggie dumplings at Mandu ($3 for 6 at happy hour!)
brunch at Asylum in Adams Morgan
Sticky Fingers Bakery has incredibly tasty vegan desserts that even non-vegans would love
Washington Deli I hear the Vegan Gary Williams sandwich is top notch

Ethical Omnivores

2010-04-05T10:27:00.000-07:00

As it turns out, there is a name for those of us who want to eat animal products but have ethical concerns about commercial agricultural practices - ethical omnivores!

You can find more info about carnivores with a conscience in this Seattle P.I. article.

Find restaurants the meet ethical animal product standards: Eat Well Guide

Find humanely farmed products in your area: Local Harvest

Find groceries that meet ethical standards:

Humane Farm Animal Care (HFAC) . List of HFAC certified sellers in D.C.
American Humane Assocation (AHA). List of AHA certified producers
Animal Welfare Assocation (AWA). List of AWA certified products.

Not sure which label fits your own ethical guidelines? This handy chart compares HFAC standards with the other animal welfare standards. But note that it does not include AWA (listed above) in the comparison.

Cat vs. Cow: our arbitrary animal caste system

2010-04-05T09:06:00.000-07:00

If people knew more about how animals are treated on commercial agriculture farms, I think many would be bothered by it, but some wouldn't. Why is that? Livestock are animals just as pets are animals, but people view them differently and have different standards for how each category of animal should be treated. The average person would never dream of putting their pregnant dog in a crate that didn't allow her to move, and would never deprive a puppy of necessary nutrition because doing so makes it taste better when slaughtered (this is what happens to veal calves). In our culture we give domesticated animals an elevated status. We find it repulsive that the Chinese eat dogs and cats. But other than the fact that we have chosen to domesticate dogs and cats, what makes them any different than other animals? If we are disgusted by people who eat dogs and cats, why aren't we disgusted by eating all animals? If we wouldn't dream of locking a dog indoors in a crate filled with its own feces, why do we treat other animals that way? These questions aren't merely philosophical, because there are ethical implications. Our food choices reflect the extent to which we care for other living creatures and the environment.

Yeah I know I sounds like a hippie, but don't worry, my newfound belief in ethical agriculture will does not come with an affinity for hackeysack, the grateful dead, or patchouli.

Vegan candy and hidden non-vegan ingredients

2010-04-02T10:16:00.000-07:00

This Candy is Vegan

Airheads taffy
Atkins peanut butter bars
Blow Pops
Brach’s Cinnamon Hard Candy
Charms lollipops
Chick-o-Sticks
Cracker Jack
Cry Babies
Dem Bones
Dots
Dum-Dums
Fireballs
Goldenberg's Peanut Chews
Hubba Bubba bubblegum
Jolly Ranchers (lollipops and hard candy)
Jujubees
Jujyfruits
Lemonheads
Mambas
Mary Janes (regular and peanut butter kisses)
Now and Later
Pez
Ring Pop lollipops
Smarties (U.S. Brand)
Sour Patch Kids
Super Bubble
Swedish Fish
Sweet Tarts
Tropical Source mini chocolate bags
Twizzlers
Zotz

Not sure if your snack is vegan? Look out for these non-vegan ingredients.

Casein—Whey’s cousin, casein is made from curdled milk. Yuck!

Gelatin—Gelatin is a protein made by boiling cows’ and pigs’ skin, tendons, ligaments, and bones.

Honey—Sure, honey tastes sweet, but bees are animals too.

Lard—Fat from hog abdomens. Eww.

Pepsin—A clotting agent made from pigs’ stomachs and used in some cheeses and vitamins.

Rennet—An enzyme taken from baby calves’ stomachs and often used for in cheese production.

Stearic Acid—Often found iin chocolate and vitamins, it comes from a fatty substance taken from slaughtered pigs’ stomachs—or from cows, sheep, or dogs and cats euthanized in animal shelters.

Cetyl Palmitate—This is the waxy oil derived from sperm whales’ heads or from dolphins.

Urea—Urea comes from urine and other "bodily fluids." It’s used to "brown" baked goods, like pretzels.

More on chicken farming

2010-03-31T11:00:00.000-07:00

Chickens have been genetically manipulated to grow much quicker and larger than their ancestors. According to a May 26, 1997 article in Feedstuffs, an agribusiness journal, "...broilers now grow so rapidly that the heart and lungs are not developed well enough to support the remainder of the body, resulting in congestive heart failure and tremendous death losses." Researchers have found that this lameness is so chronically painful that lame chickens will repeatedly choose food that has painkillers added to it over regular feed. Another study found that 26% of broiler chickens are severely crippled and that 90% cannot walk normally.

Sources:

Danbury, T.C. et al. (2000, March 11). Self-selection of the analgesic drug carprofen by lame broiler chickens. Veterinary Record, 146, 307-11.
Kestin, S.C. et al. (1992, Aug. 29). Prevalence of leg weakness in broiler chickens and its relationship with genotype. Veterinary Record, 131, 190-194.
http://www.chooseveg.com/chickens-turkeys.asp

Disturbing information on chickens and eggs http://www.chooseveg.com/eggs.asp

More info on agrifarming and ethical issues generally http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Factory_farming#Ethics

Ethical eating and first glimpse into poultry production

2010-03-31T10:53:00.000-07:00

Though my month of eating vegan doesn't begin until April 1, I have started reading Peter Singers' "The Way We Eat." Though I doubt I will go vegan for life, I can already tell that this little experiment will result in some radical changes in my food choices. Here are some of my thoughts so far:

Singer makes an interesting point that historically food choices were guided by ethics, just as our other life choices are ethically based. Today many religions still have ethical guidelines for food i.e. kosher and halal products but increasingly (and unfortunately) there is a rise in the belief that humans were meant to hold dominion over the animal world, a belief associated with some literal interpretations of the Christian bible. At any rate, I DO think it makes sense to take ethics into account when choosing what we eat.

Animals are not people, but they are living creatures! I don't think it's ok to be cruel to living creatures. I am not bothered by animal slaughter, or by my Dad's hunting of animals, or by the idea of humans eating animals in general. However, I am bothered by processes commercial farms use to raise and process animal products. I don't think it's right to confine thousands of chickens to cages no larger than a piece of paper where they cannot flap their wings or graze naturally, to rip of their beaks, or to force them to live in their own shit. \

So at this point, I will say that i'm ok eating eggs and poultry from a family farm where chickens aren't crammed into crates or injected with growth hormones or otherwise subjected to the treatment typical of large commercial farms, but i'm not ok with poultry products that come to market via the Tyson's farm method. Unfortunately that rules out pretty much all poultry products available in grocery stores. I'm hoping that I can find ethically produced items at my local farmers market this summer. Fortunately, it looks like there 2 small farms near DC that sell at my local farmers market! Thanks http://www.localharvest.org for the info :-)

How is finding a house in DC like becoming a political appointee in Afghanistan?

2010-03-30T08:52:00.000-07:00

Bribery.

Seriously, I just emailed a future potential roommate the specs for my Williams Sonoma all-clad slow cooker so she can use them to convince the one holdout roommate that I (and my cat) should live there. Other incentives included a cuisinart food processor, an electrolux vacuum, a burr coffee grinder, an extensive costume collection, and free tooth whitening gel. Surely the holdout can tolerate one sweet little cat for all this?!

A cheap, spacious room in a house close to metro and roommates who are no strangers to cleaning products is a rare find in this town. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Additional suggestions for bribery (and possibly corruption) are welcome.

My favorite left-handed gay Jewish congressmen strikes again!

2010-03-29T10:21:00.001-07:00

"Recently Mr. Boehner gave a talk to bankers in which he encouraged them to balk efforts by Congress to impose stricter regulation. “Don’t let those little punk staffers take advantage of you, and stand up for yourselves,” he urged — where by “taking advantage” he meant imposing some conditions on the industry in return for government backing. Barney Frank, the chairman of the House Financial Services Committee, promptly had “Little Punk Staffer” buttons made up and distributed to Congressional aides." NYT op-ed by Paul Krugman